Diamond Dave Returns to Van Halen Throne

Anyone who knows anything about rock understands the power of David Lee Roth. I present you these two simple equations:

Now, this is not to downplay the input of Messrs. Van Halen, Van Halen and Anthony. It’s just stating that without the bad-boy shouting, keen wit (“Reach down / between my legs / Ease the seat back”), acrobatic leaps, trademark yelps, hilarious asides (“I don’t feel tardy”) and general Rockinroll Je Ne Sais Quoi, Eddie’s finger-tapping genius and Alex/Michael’s muscle seem like a lot of tedious hokum.

And I’m not even going to get into the transgressions of The Red Rocker. They are too many and life is too short. Suffice it to say, the post-DLR Van Halen releases (aka “Van Hagar”, aka “Sam Halen”) were not worth the plastic they were pressed on. And the post-Sammy versions of VH were even more deplorable. Does anyone even remember those farm-leaguers names? I certainly don’t. . .

Plus, DLR is a rockinroll poet. Really, truly. Up there with Chuck Berry, Little Richard, Brian Wilson and everyone else who could throw some good rhymes about cool cars and hot chicks. Consider this exemplary passage from Woman & Children First’s “Everybody Wants Some!!”:

You can’t get romantic on a subway line.
Conductor don’t like it, says you’re wastin’ your time.
But ev’rybody wants some.
I want some too.
Ev’rybody wants some.
Baby, how ’bout you?
I seen a lotta people lookin’ for a moonbeam.
Yeah, ya spent a lot. Ya got lost in the jet-stream.
But ev’rybody wants some.
I want some too.
Ev’rybody wants some.
Baby, how ’bout you?

Kinda gets to the heart of the matter, no? So, let’s thank the rock gods for bringing Brother Dave back from his forays into muzak schlock, emergency services and talk radio, and placing him exactly where he was intended to be: fronting the powerhaus rock quartet that is VH.

Now, as far as Wolfgang (Eddie’s fourteen year old son) taking over for Michael Anthony on the Four String Beast, one can only see this as a classic slap in the face. . .

Eddie VH: Hey Michael! You wanna tour w/ the VH boys and Diamond Dave?
Michael A.: Ah man, I don’t think so.
Eddie VH: Ok that’s cool. The bass parts are so easy I’ll have my fourteen year old son play them. See ya!

I mean, let’s face it, “Runnin’ With Devil” is not exactly Jaco Pastorius. One question remains, will Lil’ Wolfie do the old “pound a quart of Jack Daniels and break the bass in half” schtick? One can only hope so. . .

PS. Required Reading

This entry was posted by Chester K. on Tuesday, February 6th, 2007 at 10:01 am

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dish 02/06/2007 01:18 PM 1 point
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Holy cow!

I been waiting for this! Is it true? Is the teasing finally over?

I'm bummed that Anthony won't be there. His back-up vocals are always sweet. (Everyone gives him the 'Ringo' treatment with VH, but his back-ups are his secret weapon.) I'd rather see Alex gone than Anthony.

But enough of that. DLR back on the throne is a beautiful thing. Like seeing Ace back in Kiss or seeing John Lyman back in Compund Red. Or one day seeing a Punchdrunk reunion!

I'm there. I only hope my disdain that has grown for the VH brothers as a result of their treatment of the king of schlock rock will wash away sufficiently for me to not let it get the way of my enjoyment of it.

DiSh!

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Van Wailin' 02/06/2007 03:21 PM 1 point
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DLR back with Van Halen! The a-rock-alypse has come!! Well, almost...

Putting Wolfgang in the line of fire is tantamount to child abuse.

Do you know what DLR does to 14-year-old minds?

'Nuff said!

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stevebuscemi 02/06/2007 06:31 PM 1 point
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I saw DLR do a solo show at the Nokia theatre last year. It was kinda sad. He couldn't do the roundhouse kicks, and the outrageous fashions just looked sorry on him.

I don't think this will be a good show. makes me sad cuz I grew up with Van Halen.

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susan 02/18/2007 06:10 PM 1 point
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Sad that a 53 year old can't do a round house kick? or sad that you would expect him to?

you grew up with VH?

are you sure you grew up?

you mention his kick and his clothes...what about his voice? he sounds better than ever.

Dave looks great...check out the next issue of Rolling Stone...on news stands 2/23.

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